April 12, 2007

What's NOT to love?!

The Powerglove was indeed, bad—but not in an ironic, Michael-Jackson-wearing-black-leather-covered-in-zippers type of way. The Powerglove was a craptastic piece of crap, so crappy that the Colecovision voice modulator looks at it and snickers. Why did the Powerglove suck so badly and profoundly? I mean, it looked cool, right? Well, for starters (and enders) it didn't work. The smooth-as-silk movements of the Wizard's antagonist (who we'll just call the love-child of that dude from The Greatest American Hero)could NOT be duplicated in actual gameplay. Usually, the lucky person who donned the Powerglove spent his time making jerky motions, mashing buttons and trying to get the dumb sensor bars to quit falling off his TV. The Powerglove, rather than providing an edge for the gamer, (or at least a fun experience for the gamer) was actually a frustrating, disappointing steaming pile—but man, did it look AWESOME! The BEST part of the Powerglove was putting it on (feeling like a medieval warrior strapping on a gauntlet with velcro straps), putting your acid-washed denim collar up and then wildly flailing around for a half-hour playing Kid Icarus. The SECOND best part was taking it off and using the regular control so you could actually play your games. By the way, Fred Savage OWNED that punk with his snappy comeback, end of story.

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